Every female out there knows that being catcalled is nothing new. The sad truth is that, if you’re a girl, and you haven’t been catcalled, you’re a rarity.
I couldn’t even begin to count the times I’ve been catcalled. I’ve heard it argued that “It’s a compliment” or “Be grateful that you’re getting positive attention!” However, if this was the case, don’t you think there would be a whole lot less articles talking against catcalling and degrading women?
This video shows the effects of catcalling. Or rather, what the men in our life would say and how they feel when we get catcalled. To us women, it’s not that surprising. Turning the tables, if there were women whistling at my man, I’d be pissed. He’s mine, get your mitts off. Sadly, the video doesn’t really go into depth on what the men think when they see their girlfriends getting catcalled, only that it upsets them and they don’t like it.
So because I wanted honest responses, that weren’t edited for a video, I went ahead and asked a handful of guys the same question: “Your girlfriend is being catcalled (whether you’re with her or not)…how would you react?”
And here’s their responses:
1. “At first I know I’d be really upset and I know that every time she left without me I would be truly frightened for her well-being and safety. But just worrying isn’t going to change anything. I think really it all needs to start with us. Be the change you want to see in the world. Being sure to not do those things yourself and letting those around you (your friends and family) know that catcalling isn’t okay with you. If I was with her, I know without a doubt that I would stand up for her. These people need to know that what they’re doing is wrong. Standing up for a girl you care about regardless of if it’s your girlfriend, sister, or even a stranger, is important. It shows people that they shouldn’t be doing what they’re doing. It creates an atmosphere where maybe they’ll learn something and others who were scared to stand up will begin to. You gotta be that leader and set the example.”
2. “I would be proud and mad. Because I can be like “Hell yeah! My girl is so beautiful all men want her!” And then I’d be pissed because no man will ever talk to my girl like that, I would be really pissed if I met all the men that talk to her like that. If you’re going to compliment a girl, you have to do it respectively, no questions.”
3. “I would be very upset. If I were with her I would probably yell at the guy and wouldn’t walk away from a fight. If I wasn’t with her I would still be upset but there is nothing I could do about it.”
4. “It would make me feel angry because women are not pieces of meat that walk around to get whistled and hollered at. Women are just as equivalent as men and there’s no reason why guys should speak to women like that. The clothes women wear sometimes may instigate unwanted attention but this doesn’t justify the behavior of some men, although it contributes to their reactions.”
5. “If I was with her I’d probably end up knocking someone out mainly because I know she’s beautiful but no one ever talks down to my girlfriend like that, especially when I’m around. If I wasn’t with her and I had to watch her in that video, I would probably get extremely upset knowing that when I’m not with her, this is the kind of stuff that happens and I can’t keep her safe from it. I really think us guys need to be more aware of this kind of stuff. It’s happening almost daily to our girlfriends, our sisters, our mothers, and one day it will happen to our daughters…I do have to say though, I know my girlfriend doesn’t take any sh*t from anyone, especially catcallers. Though I’m proud of how she stands up for herself, I’m also terrified that one day one of those creeps on the street may just take it a little too far with her and I won’t be there to protect her. Guys, we can do better than this.”
6. “It depends on how my girlfriend feels about it, and how strong they come on. Like if they whistle when they drive by I’d be like “Told you you look fine, girl.” However, if they said something really rude and it made her uncomfortable, I’d shake my first and say something like, “Hey, get out of here! You tryna get knocked out you idiot?!”
7. “I would be really upset, and probably take action.”
It shouldn’t come as a shock that these men love us, and care about us, and don’t want us to be seen as objects.
Women have admitted that they just assume that they will be raped at some point in their life, and it’s inevitable to them. I can personally say that, every time I’m walking alone, and someone catcalls at me, there is a moment in time where I think rape may actually happen. And I know I’m not alone in this. Women do not like to be catcalled, having men whistle and yell derogatory things to us from across the street is not flattering.
I have been out with my guy before, and been catcalled, and he gets outrageous. And he does the same when he sees other women getting catcalled. It’s unacceptable, and we need to share the message that it’s not okay, it is affecting so many more people, negatively, than you’d think.
Featured Image via screengrab from American Reunion.
Every single time I’ve been cat called it has been by a black man.