Let me start off by saying I love coffee and I don’t know what I would do without it in my day-to-day life. Most people just have a cup of coffee in the morning to wake them up for their busy day, but to me it’s a simple pleasure of life. When I go out to get coffee I usually go for the basic choice of hitting up Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts. Scrolling through Instagram or Tumblr, I always come across photos of very trendy looking coffee shops, but I had never been to one. My friend and I are huge coffee buffs and can never say no to a good cup of joe, so the both of us decided to venture out to these hipster spots. We visited a few and I can honestly say I’ll happily stick to Starbucks and Dunkin’ Donuts from now on.
1. The Menus Make No Sense
The coffee blends are listed with the country they derived from next to it, which are adjectives to describe the notes of flavor in them. This is my first problem because some of the words used to describe the coffee were: juicy, wintergreen, and plum. Maybe to someone whose life is dedicated to coffee would find these adjectives helpful but to me they made zero sense as to what the blend was actually going to taste like. A “wintergreen” coffee just does not seem appetizing to me.
2. The Music Is Just Plain Strange
When you walk into a coffee shop you can expect that 9 out of 10 times the music will be some indie band you most likely have never heard of. At a hipster coffee shop it is so much more than that. The music playing switches between instrumental beats and some band you’ll never hear again because one of the baristas is actually in it.
3. Mason Jar Overload
Although the mason jars filled with your favorite choice of iced coffee look cute to take a photo of, the whole act is almost sacrilegious to coffee drinking purists. Coffee in mugs and to go cups makes sense, coffee in mason jars gives me the same feeling of confusion when I see people eating salad out of one. Not to mention the inefficiency when drops of coffee are constantly spilling onto your clothing.
4. The Overall Environment Is A No-Go
It could be the sunniest day of the year, yet every time I have walked into one of these trendy coffee shops it seems to be 20x darker inside. I can’t tell if it’s because they usually only have 2 single light bulbs lighting the entire store or because black walls with dark wood seem to be a common style. Not to mention that these shops are always filled with calm people who seem to have no responsibilities in the world, compared to Starbucks on a Monday morning that’s filled with people on the verge of insanity waiting for their coffee, which gives me comfort knowing I’m not the only one stressing out.
No matter how many of these hipster coffee shops I have been to, I have never really found one that changes my current opinion on them. I will give credit where credit is due and say their prices are far more reasonable than mainstream coffee shops. This being said, no matter how basic it is to run into Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts for a cup of coffee, I would still choose these venues over these non-basic “trendy” shops. As much as I tried to be the type of person that would frequent these types of shops, I just could not find my place in the mason jars or the “wintergreen” blend.
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