There’s a suitcase packed with a few outfits
And my favorite book tucked under my bed.
I could just grab it and be gone in 30 seconds flat.
The thing about leaving is that it’s all that I know.
No one ever taught me how to stay, so, please
Forgive me if I dismiss every memory made
With the silent slamming of the door.
My footsteps will haunt you and
Dance in your mind.
My scent will linger on your pillowcase
And be the last thing you think of before you fall asleep.
The way I leave will be your death sentence.
The songs I showed you will pierce your ears,
And the movies we watched will scorch your eyes.
The miles we walked will put pins in your feet,
And the breaths we shared will clog your lungs.
The kisses we shared will slice your throat,
And in the moments that you can’t breathe,
You will remember that I’m gone.
I will leave like it is the easiest thing to do.
You don’t know how I fail to find a sweater
That comforts me the way yours did.
Your smile shone so brightly that without it,
I live in solitary confinement.
Being alone terrifies me,
But loving you would have killed me.
I would have lost myself in you,
And then you would have left.
I guess I find it easier to leave than to be left.
I hope you realize that the way I left
Speaks volumes about my feelings for you.
I want to be the reminder of what you deserve
In a more permanent form.
Featured image via Justin Groep on Unsplash
