We all love Disney princesses. We’re the generation that loves them. We’re the generation that grew up wishing our princes would come, wishing we could meet Prince Eric, or just sing and have birds come to be our friends because how cool would that be?! But as we’ve grown, our perception of these princesses have changed. You know you’ve grown up when you begin to agree with the parents in those movies. We’re more independent. We don’t need a man to define us!
Sure, we all still want to be princesses, but Disney princesses bring so much drama into our lives! Plus, imagine being friends with them! No, thank you. That would be so annoying. Here’s the definitive list of Disney princesses that would be annoying AF in real life.
Ariel
First of all, this girl took the hottest Disney prince from us, so I don’t want her hanging around. Similarly, Ariel would never shut up about how much cooler all of her other friends are. Plus, look how quickly she dropped Flounder for Prince Eric. I don’t need to worry about her dropping me as soon as someone better comes around. And come on… that hair?? She brushes it with a goddamn fork and it still looks majestic. I don’t need to be jealous of yet another one of my friends’ hair.
Jasmine
Okay, so I love how sassy Jasmine is because I’m the same way. But even I know that my sass goes unappreciated sometimes, and this girl doesn’t know when to be serious! And her tiger? While I would love to cuddle with him, I don’t think I would appreciate the tiger coming around every time I want to just watch some Netflix. Honestly, I’d rather be friends with her dad, the Sultan. He’s pretty cool. At least she brushes her hair with an actual brush.
Sleeping Beauty
This girl isn’t even a true princess! All of the other princesses at least do something – even if they just bravely defy their fathers. All Aurora does is sing about dreaming and then falls asleep. She’s also not the smartest princess, is she? Oh yes, let’s watch my dad burn all the spinning wheels and then find the only spinning wheel in the whole kingdom and touch it. And let’s not forget her weird obsession with dancing with strangers in the woods. Girl, just stop. Take your fairies and leave.
Rapunzel
Okay, so yes, she has one of the best movies and definitely has one of the best princes, but she’s not the sharpest tack in the shed. It’s not her fault, I mean she lived in a tower her whole life with a sassy chameleon as her only friend. But I don’t think any of us need a clueless friend hanging around with us when we wanna chill. And sure, she’s self-sacrificing and caring and loving, but do we really want to spend the night with someone who’s just obsessed with lanterns? No. Although, it would be nice to have a friend who’s handy with self-defense.
Snow White
First of all, that high pitched squeaky voice would get really annoying really fast. Second, as the first official Disney princess, you know she’s got some sort of weird complex. And third, she’s got major commitment issues. Sure, she rode off into the sunset with her prince, but she also had seven men with her, doing everything she wanted, when she wanted it.
Elsa
Honestly, I could think of nothing good about knowing Elsa. Yes, she has cool powers, loves her sister, and is independent, but I would imagine she’s really boring to hang out with. While it would be handy to have someone around who could cool off those really hot days of summer, it could be annoying to constantly be cold around her. Plus, what would she possibly want to talk about? Her cool ice castle in the mountains? How she’s the queen now even though she’s totally unqualified and also kind of a recluse? Really, Elsa, it’s time to let it go (see what I did there?).
Cinderella
I really would not want to hang out with Cinderella – ever. Unless she was going to let me borrow her fairy godmother when I was in need of a ballgown. We all know how her real fairytale ended – Stepmother and stepsisters getting eaten by birds and tortured, etc. – so this girl has a real dark side. I would never want to cross her. Best to just leave the drama at home.
Tiana
I am a hardcore fan of Tiana. But let’s be real, she’s a workaholic. She would always want to talk about her restaurant and how popular it is and how nice it is her dreams came true. And don’t you think she’s bitter that she spent her whole movie as a frog? You know you’d hear about that if you hung out. And if she wasn’t talking about work or her time as a frog, she’d be complaining about how entitled Charlotte is. Yeah, no. Although I do love beignets, so maybe she could hook a girl up.
In all seriousness, I think all of the Disney princesses have a lot to teach us, and we should definitely love them all. I know I do. They’re all beautiful, have great hair, smart (for the most part). But I love them on TV. I really don’t think I would like being friends with them, or even knowing them in real life.
Featured image via “Disney Princess Place Mat” by hz536n/George Thomas / CC BY-NC-ND
aladdin is clearly the hottest disney prince eric can get ouuuuut