I am almost thirty and I still don’t fully have my shit together.
Newsflash: I am still okay with it, so stop trying to make me feel like less than a human for it.
I am tired of the high standards that society has set for us. You must go to college if you want to have any job. You must go to grad school if you want a good job. You must get that job soon afterward so that you can find that perfect person and prepare for a perfect life together. With a big yard, a large white picket fence and 2.5 children running with a perfect dog in the front yard. You must start saving for that 401K so that you can retire at the ripe age of 65 and then begin to enjoy the life that you created. But what about those who don’t have life going that way for them? What about those who chose to take a different path? What about those who just don’t give a damn about the way that life is “supposed” to look?
I am tired of having people making me feel like half of a human because I still live at home. It wasn’t part of the plan, but I am choosing to live at home. Why? Because life got in the way and I am trying to be responsible by saving my money so I can own my own home. I see friends and coworkers who rent places struggle to make ends meet. Frankly, I would prefer to know that I can afford to eat something other than Ramen noodles if I choose to and that I am better preparing for my future.
I am tired of people asking, “When are you going to settle down?” because I am still single. It wasn’t part of the plan, but I would prefer not to settle. Why? Because it is a hell of a lot better than staying in a relationship with a guy that will walk all over me or cheats. I see friends and acquaintances settled into engagements/marriages just to say that they put on a ring on it or they don’t have to be alone. I am quite alright knowing that I do not have a person out there in the world cheating on me at the moment and knowing that I am better off by not settling into an unhappy relationship.
I am tired of living in a society that looks down on me because I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. It wasn’t part of the plan, but I am simply happy going with the flow. Why? Because I am in this happy place in life. I see strangers around me struggling to like the career that they had chosen just for financial purposes. I would rather enjoy my career and life, even if it means less money and that I am content.
I find it insulting every day to hear that I am doing something wrong with my life because I try to enjoy every moment of it. Just because I choose to live at home doesn’t make me helpless. Just because I didn’t go to college for something that would make me well over six figures doesn’t mean that I am deeply unhappy. Just because I am single doesn’t mean that I am lonely. Just because I am not living my life the way that society told me to live it in the 1950s, doesn’t mean that I am doing something wrong with it.
In some way, we are all breaking “society’s standards.” There is no right and wrong way to live your life. It is yours and yours alone. You get the option to screw it up if you would like to, but you also get the option to pick up the pieces if you choose. Do not let the way others are living dictate how you choose to live yours. What works for you might not work for them. Always remember, you have to do what is best for you, even if that means going against the norm.
Featured image via Jonathan Borba on Unsplash
Thank you, this is what I needed to hear.