It’s nice to know that so many people trust and confide in you. Admirably, you are always available to become a personal therapist for one of your friends, but lately, you aren’t getting the same joy from aiding others as you used to. It is okay to turn your phone off, even though you’ll feel guilty for not being accessible to others.
It’s a shame that so many of these people don’t ask you how you are doing, thinking you are always okay. You deserve a break. Some time for yourself may allow you to be better at giving advice and helping your friends, so don’t be afraid to be a little selfish.
Your shoulders are not designed to carry the weight of everyone else’s problems on top of your own. It’s no wonder that your steps have become slower and you constantly look drained; that’s a lot of weight for one person to carry. Some people may think that you can solve all of their problems, and yes, it’s good to have a person who can listen to your problems, but there is a line.
Friendship is about wanting each other to succeed and being the best versions of yourselves That’s a little hard to do when people expect you to always be up at 2 am ready to hear their problems for the next 4 hours, even though you were just trying to finish a paper and their breakup (for the sixth time this year) shouldn’t take precedence over your own work.
Sometimes, the best thing to do is remind people that you are not a therapist, you are their friend. As much as you would be willing to help anyone in crisis, sometimes a professional is the best aid. People can’t expect you to be their own personal dumping ground for their daily tragedies, thinking that you don’t have your own.
Life in general is stressful. Once you add your own daily responsibilities like work, school, your own relationships, finances, and friendships, it’s a little hard to be there for everyone else. It doesn’t make you a selfish person if you do a selfish act. Take time for yourself. Turn your phone off and watch a movie or read a book. If you’re someone who is always there for everyone but yourself, it’ll be pretty hard for you to ever become a bad friend. Friends will understand that you need time for yourself, and if they don’t, well they weren’t your friend in the first place.
Featured image via Elijah O’Donnell on Pexels
