Recently a friend and I were joking about how I should become a stripper (mostly for the great health benefits, competitive wages, and the easy nightly traffic commute – Obviously the reasons you become a stripper). You would think that there was no way this conversation could take a serious turn, but it did. While he told me I was a good looking girl and should seriously look into it, I turned down the offer protesting that my lack of coordination and pole dancing skills would be the downfall to me maintaining the job. My friend then proceeded to tell me that it was actually my lack of self-confidence that was holding me back.
While that was a curve ball, I joked that off and said something about the height of the hooker heels being dangerous and that I was scared of heights. Proceeding on with the nakedness of the conversation, it veered in the direction of nude photos. After I told him that nude photos are not a normal way of communication for the average woman, he told me that I also lacked confidence because I am not comfortable enough with my body to send a nude photo. In his eyes, confident women send men naked photos to really show a man that they have an interest in them.
This brings me to the subject at hand today – Just because a woman isn’t showing off her body, it doesn’t mean that she is not comfortable in her own skin.
I hope that every man doesn’t have the same type of logic when it comes to this, but I feel the need to point something out. There are two different type of women in this world when it comes to body types – Women who like to show it off and women who prefer not to. Just because a woman shows it off, doesn’t necessarily mean that she is comfortable with it. Some are really insecure, but like the attention that comes with it. Same goes for a woman who doesn’t show her body off; it doesn’t necessarily mean that she is not a fan of her body. Some are just comfortable with it remaining covered and prefer not to be ogled by men all day long.
It is frustrating to hear time and time again from men that there is something wrong with a woman if she is not providing you with something that you want. In man logic: If a woman is not putting out, she is a prude. If she is not forcing herself on you sexually, something is wrong with her. If she is not overexerting herself to be a part of your life, she is not interested. If she is consistent with her communication with you, she is needy. If she has freaked out at you multiple times for being an ass-clown, she is a crazy person. If she has told you multiple times that she is not going to send you naked photos of herself, she is lacking self-confidence. Sorry fellas to tell you, that is just not the case with all women. Women are not always the problem when it comes to you not being able to date or understand them.
Sometimes, gentlemen, you need to take a step back and realize if it is becoming a pattern for you that you are getting shot down for nude pictures, or shot down in general for doing something inappropriate, you might be the problem. The average woman will not send you naked photos out of the blue just to show she is interested in you. It is not because she is lacking confidence or uncomfortable with her body, she is just not interested in sending nude photos of herself. That is not a normal thing. Maybe after you have been dating for several months, things might change, but generally speaking, if you are not dating the woman, it is a fair shot that she is not going to be sending you these things. Food for thought: Real confidence comes from someone who is able to say no to you, even if that means losing the chance at a relationship.
When it comes down to it guys, a woman shouldn’t have to send you a naked photo just to prove that she is interested in you or that she is confident in herself. It takes a stronger person to say no to something, rather than just putting it out there. Think about that the next time you bug a girl for a naked picture. Would you really want someone who gives it up that quickly or would you rather wait for the chance to see it in person?
Featured image via Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels
