Why I Don’t Believe In Searching For My ‘Other Half’

I’m not searching for my ‘other half.’  

I’m not searching for the man who will complete me, fulfilling all my deepest desires and making me feel whole.

I’m searching for a man who lingers in my mind, a man who haunts me but does not consume my every thought, stifling my sense of autonomy.

I’m searching for a man who loves deeply from a distance, a man who loves hard but craves independence, a man with whom I can survive either together or alone.

I’m searching for a man unafraid to reveal imperfection, a man whose flaws match my own, bonding us tighter and strengthening our love.

I’m searching for a man who loves me, truly, purely, and deeply but who does not need me, a man who understands and accepts that I love him wholeheartedly but also that I do not rely on him for happiness in life.

I’m searching for a man who understands that love is a balance. A man who has passions besides our love. A man whose love for me is powerful but whose love extends far enough to pursue his wildest dreams with his whole heart. A man who knows that my love is deep but reaches far beyond him to my passions and dreams.  

I’m searching for a man who views me as his equal, an accomplished man unthreatened by my accomplishments, a successful man undaunted by my successes. A man who supports my unquellable sense of ambition, just as I support his. A man who never attempts to sway me to compromise my sense of drive just to boost his ego.  

I’m searching for a man who will complement my strengths but not compensate for my weaknesses. A man who is unafraid to admit he feels weak, just as I do. A man with whom I can grow as we each smooth the cracks in our own hearts, relying on each other for support along the journey, but not for complete fulfillment.

I’m searching for a man with a whole, but blemished heart, just like mine. Our souls similarly, beautifully imperfect, but not intertwined. Our hearts pulsing separately but skipping the same beat as we walk hand-in-hand.

I’m not searching for my “other half” because I have discovered that I am whole, even in my brokenness. I’m not searching for my “other half” because I have recognized the beauty of self-reliance. I’m not searching for my “other half” because I know I never need a man to complete me.

Previously published on Thought Catalog.

Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.