Your heart’s buried beneath the rubble of broken promises, sharp accusations, and the unbearable weight of emotional distance. Their absence suffocates you; dragging you further and further into the impenetrable wounds of heartache. The empty space in the bed you shared haunts you; compelling you to long for their hand holding yours, their heart cherishing yours. But they have already slipped away, fading into oblivion, their mind a desolate wasteland, their heart cool to the touch.
You ponder every word that’s escaped your lips; every harsh lash of the tongue, every thought you regret expressing. You recall every moment you acted out of anger; wishing you could have prevented the deafening space they created. You blame yourself; constantly, relentlessly questioning how you could have improved yourself, convincing yourself that they left because they deserve better.
But you deserve more than the lies they sway you to believe, more than the stone-cold silences, more than the threats, the accusations, the broken promises, the suffocating distance.
You deserve more than the one who left you.
You deserve an intimate love; a love that removes the space they’ve created. You deserve to trust someone as deeply as you trust yourself; to adore someone as fervently as they adore you, to feel your heart melting into theirs as their heart melts into yours. You deserve to feel as though you are one with someone again, to know indubitably that your connection is unbreakable.
You deserve a love that doesn’t hurt; a love that doesn’t break, bruise or scar, a love that heals the deep wounds of the past. You deserve a love that doesn’t bully, a love that doesn’t deride, a love that doesn’t threaten, a love that doesn’t accuse. You deserve a gentle love; a love rooted in kindness, empathy, and trust. You deserve a partner who makes you feel safe in their arms, as if their mere presence melts away your past trauma, banishing any sliver of unease from your mind.
You deserve the love of your dreams; a love that feels surreal, even in its undeniable reality. You deserve to immerse yourself in a hazy kaleidoscope of color as your lover kisses you; to see your life in silver and gold, rose and crimson. You deserve to feel as though your love is new; to feel giddy excitement course through your soul every time your partner speaks your name, to relive the simple pleasures of youth every time they hold your hand. You deserve a love that lasts; leaving you awash in dreamy nostalgia forevermore.
You deserve more than the one who left you.
As the empty space in your bed consumes you, as you wish for more, know that the pain that’s burying your soul is not true love. You deserve a pure love; a love that knows no pain, a love that is joyful, passionate, trusting, sincere. You deserve to fill the void in your life; to find the missing piece of your heart, because no matter how vehemently you convince yourself otherwise, you merit a love that stays.
Previously published on Thought Catalog.
Featured Photo by Melody Jacob on Unsplash.
