When I asked for a bra in third grade, my mom shot me down.
“You don’t need one!” she said, motioning toward my chest. And she was right. I was, anatomically, still the same on the top as my best buddy (who happened to be a boy), but I wanted one anyway.
By the time I started developing, acquiring a bra was at the forefront of my mind.
I already knew that little bit of fabric was a very big deal. Sadly, the excitement I felt was laced with a sense of shame and the sneaking feeling that there was something wrong with wanting one.
Now that I’m a mom, I never want my kids to feel shame for their bodies or for growing up.
Many of my friends who are parents are upset over the fact that bras are being made for and marketed to pre-pubescent girls.
My answer? Bras for little girls are great … seriously!
There’s nothing wrong with little girls in age-appropriate bras, if they want to wear them.
After all, science says that girls start puberty between the ages of 8 and 13, and studies have shown that minority girls may go through puberty even younger than white girls.
So sometimes young girls are going to need bras.
Sometimes they just want a bra for fun. That’s okay, too!
Because there’s NOTHING sexual about an age-appropriate bra for a kid who wants one. Some styles are made just for little girls, just as there are for adolescents and teens.
And while most of us grown-ups think about looking sexy when we buy bras, and consider the image of a woman wearing a bra as sexual in nature, kids are different.
Your daughter may be looking for a bra because she wants more modesty, may feel more physically comfortable in one, or she may just like the way it looks.
And these are ALL good reasons to buy her a bra if she wants one.
Let her know that she can talk to you about her feelings, needs, and how she’s changing. This may be your first opportunity to let her know that the changes her body will go through are wonderful, and that you are always going to be there for her with non-judgmental support.
The fact that our little kids are going to grow up is a GOOD thing.
Embrace this phase of your daughter’s life with enthusiasm and pride, not shame and secrecy, and she will learn that she has someone she can rely on through the turbulent times to come.
Originally published on YourTango
Featured Photo by Anika Huizinga on Unsplash