The other day, I had someone reach out to me via text. We chatted briefly about some casual things before I was asked , “Are you on dating apps?” To me, this text really had nothing to do with what we had been speaking about. It confused me and it was something that I didn’t feel like discussing with this person, so I sent them an emoji and stopped responding after that.
The next day, I received another text from the same person asking about my day, so I responded. But after chatting for a few minutes, the message about my day quickly turned in to “I realized that when I texted you about dating apps yesterday, you might have a boyfriend already! Do you?”
I stared at my phone in frustration and anger. If I didn’t answer the previous text, why would I answer this one? Why did they want to know so badly? The silence should have been a clear response to them. There was a reason why they weren’t told in the first place. So, why was I being asked this question again?
The more I thought about it, the angrier I got.
In my eyes, this person was basically insinuating that I needed to be in a relationship. But the reason why I didn’t share the information with them because it was simply none of their damn business.
I am someone who keeps to herself. I don’t disclose much of myself to people around me unless I choose to. Currently, I am as single as I can be. I’m not talking to anyone, not seeing anyone, and I’m not on dating apps.
Right now, I’m on my own and ok with that.
I’ve been in school for the past seven years. After graduating with my master’s degree, I’m finally free from school. Right now, I’m trying to get my life together.
And I’ve been through hell over the past few years. I’ve had my heart broken in so many ways. Honestly? I’m currently focusing on myself and falling in love with the person I see in the mirror.
Would I like to have a boyfriend right now? Sure, it would be nice. But do I need to have one right now? Not at all.
As young people, we spend so much time behind computers and textbooks that by the time we’re done with school, we barely know ourselves, let alone anyone new.
I would much rather be a confident, self-assured woman who knows her worth rather than someone who just gets into a relationship with someone for the hell of it. (Not to mention, most guys in their 20s are total idiots.)
So right now, I’m okay being on my own. I’ve always firmly believed that with life, you need to “trust the process,” and that’s what I’ve been doing. If the right person comes along, would I be open to dating? Sure! Let’s give it a go. But I’m also not going out of my way to force a relationship. I’m okay with how things are right now.
I understand that Mr. Right isn’t just going to show up at my front door and confess his love to me. But I’m okay with letting things happen organically. I could meet someone at the grocery store, maybe at a wedding, or on vacation. The point is, I’m in no rush.
You will end up where you’re meant to be, no matter what road you take to get there.
And right now, I’m okay with doing my own thing. I’m letting things and opportunities fall into my lap. When you think about it, it’s pretty exciting. You never know where life might lead you.
I know this might not be what everyone in their 20s might be doing, but it’s my love life journey, and I’m perfectly okay with that.
My journey is no one else’s but my own. If I choose to share it with you, then that’s great. But if I don’t, learn to accept it. Sometimes, people have things to share, and if they want to, they’ll share them with you. But if they don’t, or they choose to keep quiet about it. Don’t push it. Their personal lives are no one else’s business but their own. Just worry about you.
It’s really that simple.
Featured image via Tan Danh on Pexels
Yes!! Good for you. It takes a lot of maturity to be able to realize this. Sounds like the person was trying to do some digging. Good job for standing your ground! Hoping your silence spoke words to this person.
Love this! It’s OK to ask a question, but prying into someone else’s business shows a lack of respect. You don’t owe anyone anything, and if you wanted to share your personal stuff, you would! Great work!
I completely understand your perspective. Your love life is your own personal business, and no one else has the right to pry into it. Sometimes it’s nice to have a space to explore connections without the pressure of others’ expectations – almost like the omegle new for dating, where you can be open at your own pace.
You can ask a question, but it’s rude to get involved in someone else’s life. You don’t owe anyone anything, and you would share your personal information if you wanted to. Good job!