To All The Competitive Twenty Somethings Out There

Dear 20-somethings, 

It can be hard to say that life isn’t a competition. Society seems to stress the need to be competitive and the thought of winning or losing.

Everywhere we go, we see news regarding people’s accomplishments. We see the next billionaire in Forbes Magazine and the next Oscar-winning actress standing onstage, receiving the grand prize. With a world filled with awards and accolades, it’s inevitable to feel lost in the dark forest of life. And to pay close attention to those around us. 

But why do we have to be so competitive with each other? 

I’ve met so many 20-somethings in the past week who felt they had accomplished nothing. They continuously say they’re behind, even if they have many skills and talents. 

It seems as if they are unsatisfied with what they have, whether it is a decent-paying job, a fancy car, or a university degree. It’s as if many of us 20-somethings feel empty inside. 

However, we have to realize that being competitive can potentially perpetuate a toxic mindset. 

There is a saying that “Competition is the thief of joy.” When you’re competing with others, you focus on the other person’s accomplishments and victories to the point where you have to feel caught up to the people around you. And by competing, you don’t focus on your personal growth but on other people’s personal growth journeys. This thought process will manifest itself in more negative emotions. 

But is it worth putting yourself down just for materialistic reasons? 

There’s more to life than your resume or transcript. Aside from money and a car, you also have your memories and hobbies. You also have your own experiences, which are unique to you. No one can take those experiences and lessons from you, regardless of who they are. 

So, in the end, everyone’s different. 

Everyone will progress differently, and everyone has different values or goals according to their fields. Moreover, everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, which cannot be comparable. 

So, as 20-somethings, we need to get out of that competitive mindset. 

It’s not just about how others are progressing. We need to learn what makes us special and focus on our self-development. If we want to compete, it should be with our progress, not someone else’s. We know ourselves the best and are aware of our triggers and limits. And by not competing with others, we can learn to love ourselves — a challenging feat to accomplish in your 20s. 

Sincerely, 

A fellow 20-something.

Featured image via Pavel Danilyuk on Pexels