As adults, making friends isn’t easy compared to the old elementary school days. Adult friendships become more complicated as each person views friendship differently. But, there are signs that the friendship may be crumbling due to toxic behavior. So what are they? Well, here are five signs of a toxic friend:
1. Passive-Aggressive Behaviour
Have you noticed your friend making snide remarks? These remarks are an example of passive-aggressive behavior. You know your friend is trying to convey aggression subtly, maybe because they want to implement their agenda and use it against you. But whenever you hear these remarks, you need to be aware that your friend is perhaps a different person than they appeared to be.
2. Guilt-Tripping
Sometimes, toxic friends may guilt trip you into deciding for their own benefit. Let’s say you and your friend arranged a meeting, but a few days before, you informed your friend that you could not make it. Does your friend get upset and try to manipulate you into meeting them? If they do, they may be trying to guilt trip you. And guilt tripping is a definite no-no for friendships.
3. Judgemental Behaviour
Friends should respect you for your own decisions. However, if you find your friend judging you based on your own choices, you may need to be wary of your friend’s attitude. Your friend should be accepting of who you are and of your activities. But if they start to criticize you for your interests, do they respect you as a person?
4. Disrespect for Boundaries
As humans, we all have to set our own boundaries whenever we interact with others. But what happens if you communicate these boundaries and your friend constantly disregards them? You may feel disrespected as friends need to acknowledge and abide by each other’s comfort level.
5. Jealousy and Envy
Friendship is like teamwork: You and your friend work together to accomplish certain goals and achieve specific milestones. However, jealousy does occasionally arise in some friendships. But what is the point of undermining the other person? Friends should be there to encourage each other, instead of being overly competitive.
What to do in a toxic friendship?
When one of these signs starts to appear and interfere with the dynamic between you and your friend, you should address it accordingly. There are multiple ways to do this, including:
1. Communicate
Sit down with your friend and casually converse about your own observations. Let them know you do not appreciate the guilt-tripping, manipulative, and judgemental behavior. You can also ask them why they act in this manner, to understand the situation from their perspective.
2. Distance Yourself
If you have already caught onto the bad vibes, and the friendship is draining you, you perhaps should begin to distance yourself from the friend. This will allow you to implement and convey your boundaries to the friend in a different manner.
3. End the Friendship
Sometimes, it’s not enough to distance yourself or to communicate. If the friendship becomes too overbearing, you may have to end it. Although it is difficult to let people go, toxic friendships may not be worth holding onto, especially if they’re draining you.
Spotting a toxic friendship can often be difficult especially when you have just met the person. However, if their behavior has affected you and your emotions, it is best to address them accordingly and set your own boundaries. A toxic friendship can be emotionally taxing, so it is best to put yourself first.
Featured image via Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash
You have clear goals in all of our Papa’s games. You might be putting money aside for a new car or a park ticket.
Lack of support and empathy is another sign of a toxic friendship. Genuine friends should be there for you during tough times and celebrate your successes, not just be around when it’s convenient for them. If you feel like your friend is absent or indifferent to your needs, it’s a cause for concern.
A toxic friendship often involves consistent negativity or criticism that leaves you feeling drained and unappreciated. If you find that interactions with a friend frequently bring you down rather than uplift you, it might be time to reassess the relationship.