Last year, I took a social media detox. I realized I spent too much time on these platforms and not enough time in the present moment. So, I deactivated my accounts; now, I only have a select few and keep otherwise quiet online.
Now and then, I would hop back on the social media apps. But every time I did, I remembered why I took my accounts down in the first place.
While I’m not doing a complete detox anymore, I’ve started enjoying my quiet life.
Social media pressures us to post about our big accomplishments – graduations, relationships, engagements, and babies. But, when we don’t have those things to post, we compare ourselves to others in different parts of their lives.
“Oh wow, they got engaged?” we may wonder. “When’s that going to happen for me?” Or you may see someone buy a house and lament that you’re still living at home.
Without realizing it, we compare ourselves to other people’s highlight reels.
I remember, before posting on social media about something when I questioned my actions. I asked myself, “Why are you doing this? Why do you need reassurance?” These people didn’t care. And if they did, they would have already known what I was to post. That’s when I stopped posting on social media and decided to cut it off.
I started living a private, quiet life. I started doing things I didn’t need to post on social media. It was something just for me; no one else needed to know.
And you know what? I liked it.
There’s something liberating about living a private life no one else knows about. It’s nice not feeling pressured to post anything for likes and views.
I soon realized that no one needs to know what’s happening in my life if I don’t choose to tell them. It doesn’t matter if they’re friends, family, or a rando I met at a bar one night three years ago.
If I don’t want to tell anyone what’s going on in my life, I don’t have to. I don’t owe anyone an explanation; it’s my life and no one else’s. Now, I’m unbothered and focused on myself.
For me, that means keeping things to myself. I could share so much of myself with the world, but why would I? Everyone has a comment to make about anyone’s life. And that can be a headache.
Instead, I just keep things to myself and share them with whoever I choose to share them with.
I’ve learned no one has anything to look for if you don’t have anything to show off. Of course, people can take their guesses and make assumptions. But unless you say, “I’m doing this in my life right now,” no one knows.
Don’t get me wrong. Sometimes, I want to tell people what’s happening in my life. We all have those times when we want to shout our news from the rooftops. And that’s perfectly fine.
But I find having something that’s just yours to hold is pretty sweet (and it’s kind of fun watching people try to guess what’s going on in your life). I could be engaged, single, pregnant, or traveling the world.
The fact is that I could be doing anything, and no one has to know.
It’s so nice to think about. Maybe I’m home, watching a Pixar movie with my dogs snuggled by my feet. I might have plans for tomorrow, or my plans might not differ from what I’m doing now.
Whatever it is, I’m in my calm, quiet girl era. And I’m loving every moment of it.
I highly recommend it. Go ahead and do whatever you want. You don’t owe anyone a single thing because it’s your life. And you are the only one who needs to know what comes next. Even if you’re unsure what comes next, keep doing what works best for you.
Featured image via Maria Orlova on Pexels
