Pop sensation Chappell Roan recently set some boundaries with her fans, and in response, the internet has erupted with a sea of discourse and hot takes.
Considering the “HOT TO GO!” singer’s recent meteoric rise to fame, it’s not surprising that the sudden celebrity treatment overwhelms her. In her TikTok videos and Instagram statement on the subject, she’s said that fans have touched her without her consent and have “been weird” to her friends and family.
“When I’m on stage, when I’m performing, when I’m in drag, when I’m at a work event, when I’m doing press…I am at work,” she wrote. “Any other circumstances, I am not in work mode. I am clocked out. I don’t agree with the notion that I owe a mutual exchange of energy, time, or attention to people I do not know, do not trust, or who creep me out — just because they’re expressing admiration. Women do not owe you a reason why they don’t want to be touched or talked to.”
While many expressed their support for Chappell, there was also no shortage of people saying she was being overdramatic or taking her statement as proof that she isn’t cut out for stardom.
However, I think Chappell is introducing a necessary conversation about parasocial relationships and why we normalize the dehumanization of celebrities.
If you’re at the grocery store and see a celebrity, no one would think twice if you tried to hug them or took a picture of them to share with your friends. But why does making art that everyone enjoys mean that you’ll never be able to go out in public again without people harassing you?
The practice of treating celebrities like zoo animals has gotten out of hand, and it’s a double-edged sword. While it makes celebrities feel unsafe, it also gives them more power. The more society treats celebrities like they’re above everyone else, the easier it is for them to get away with problematic behavior.
At the end of the day, being a musician is a job. The musician writes and records music, and we buy it. The musician puts on a show, and we purchase tickets.
The argument that celebrities must always interact with their fans because they wouldn’t be famous without their fan base is inherently flawed. Yes, it’s true that fans give musical artists their fame and fortune. However, these artists don’t need to accept harassment from strangers out of a sense of loyalty.
By continuing to make and perform the music we love, these celebrities fulfill their end of the bargain. Meeting fans in a controlled setting like a meet-and-greet or a signing is also part of that exchange. Random interactions on the street are not. That’s when our favorite artists are off the clock, and during that time, they can set any boundaries they want.
It’s hard to stay calm when someone who’s made a big impact on your life is right in front of you. I’m sure I’ve made a few minor celebrities uncomfortable when I was a teenage fangirl. However, if you do happen to come across a celebrity in the wild and are dying to meet them, here are some tips to help respect their boundaries:
1. Assess the situation.
Does this celebrity look like they’re in the mood for a conversation? If they’re out with friends or family or seem hurried or upset, a fan interaction is probably the last thing they want. Only follow the rest of these tips if you’ve decided it’s an appropriate time to engage with the celebrity.
2. Imagine that you’re complimenting a stranger’s outfit.
Have you ever told a stranger that you love their top and then that turned into a short conversation with them? Celebrity interactions should have that energy. Remember that your favorite celebrities are humans who have their own inner worlds. They eat, sleep, and cry. So don’t scream that you love them or start trauma dumping on them. Just tell the artist their work means a lot to you — and leave it there.
3. Look but do not touch.
I doubt you’d like a random stranger poking or hugging you. Your favorite celebrity may not feel like a stranger to you, but you’re definitely a stranger to them. Don’t make it weird — don’t try to hug someone you’ve just met. They likely don’t want physical affection from a complete stranger.
Chappell Roan is right to set boundaries around fan interactions, and more celebrities should follow her lead. How have you handled celebrity encounters? Let us know in the comments!
Featured Photo via Google Creative Commons.
