I’m Not Responsible For Saving A Relationship You Destroyed

Recently, a relationship I’ve had with someone for a long time came to a crashing halt. This person and I have known each other for years, and we had a big disagreement about something. I chose to let this person have a moment to say what they needed to because something clearly hit a nerve with them.

However, once I thought that the situation had calmed down, the person came back at me with another argument. They said things that I never thought I would hear from them. 

I stood there in amazement and wondered, “Who do you think you are to be talking to me like this?” 

After that, I looked the person in the eyes, got in my car, and drove away without saying a single word. 

I drove home fuming because I couldn’t understand why this person thought they could speak to me like this. One misunderstanding, and bam! This person was doing everything in their power to tear me down and make me feel like a piece of shit, and all I did was state my opinion about something.

I picked up the phone to call or text them about the situation countless times. I’ve drafted many texts in my notes app, trying to think of what I needed to say, but I deleted them because I didn’t know what to say. I felt like I was speaking to a brick wall. But I also felt like I needed to apologize, but for what? They were the one who made me feel a certain way, and I spoke up. But when I did, I got attacked and berated. 

So it’s ok for you to come after me and be cruel, but when I speak up, it’s a problem?

You’re not perfect and shouldn’t be running around acting like you are. You need to realize you can create a problem even if you don’t want to admit it. I know I had a part in it, and I will admit that. But you’re the reason why the problem came up. 

I’m allowed to feel a certain way about a situation. And if I cope with it in my own way, that’s my prerogative. 

But when you got called out and didn’t like it, you went in for the kill instead of apologizing and trying to do better. You said things to me that you knew would hurt me. You said things you knew would break my heart and didn’t care. 

Meanwhile, I would never say anything like that to you because it’s not who I am. 

But now I know the type of person you are, and I can’t believe I let you trick me for so long. You’re mean and bitter, acting like a nice person until someone calls you out. Then, the true version of you comes out.

Oh, and you think everything is about you, even when it’s not. You think the universe revolves around you.

So yes, I am still angry with you and have every right to be. You took how I felt and twisted it around so you could make everyone feel sorry for you when I’m the one you pissed off, to begin with. 

If I’m being honest, I have no interest in restoring our relationship. You proved how quickly you can switch up on the people around you. You showed how mean and terrible you can be. It’s sad because I thought you were better than that.

I don’t see this relationship ever returning to normal, even if you were to apologize to me sincerely. Besides, I know you won’t do it since you see no wrong in what you did.

But deep down, you must know you’re the one in the wrong because of how you responded to being called out. In a world where you’ve been told you’re always perfect, someone spoke up, which you didn’t like.

Here’s a reality check: You’re not perfect, and you need to accept that. 

If I never speak to or see you again, it will be too soon. Because you hit a nerve, and I said “stop,” but you kept going. You knew exactly where to hit, and it’s not something you can take back.  

It doesn’t hurt me that our relationship ended. Now I see you for who you truly are, and I don’t need that type of person in my life. But it should hurt you because we had a good relationship, and you destroyed it. 

I hope you can live with that because you did this to yourself.

Featured image via Hoàng Chương on Pexels

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