Office. Dungeon. Hideout. Bastion. Whether your evil lair is a humble hole in the ground or a magnificent castle, its aesthetic and function matters. A lair should be in a remote location, command respect and fear, and be just confusing enough that you can navigate it but outsiders won’t know where to go. Do you want a practical wartime bunker or perhaps a magical wizard tower? These choices are important and will determine how you both operate and decorate your lair. After all, evil needs a dark heart to thrive in and a mysterious place to call home. Here are eight essentials for your evil lair:
1. Soviet-Era Switchboards
Why have a dark lab without decrepit, out-of-date technology? Your switchboard panels can include any manner of switches, buttons, and knobs and should easily connect to a computer or your dungeon’s lights. With a splash of color, you can either make your dungeon a “Star Trek”-inspired space or go for a forgotten WWII bunker look. These old systems can use electrical, hydraulic, or even thermal energy.
2. A Large-Scale Tank
Sharks and piranhas are all the rage, but there’s a reason that they’re classic. What better way to send a message about your villainy than to have deadly sea creatures encircle your lair? Water tanks are versatile décor, and they can easily bring inner peace to your hidden sanctum. Don’t want to bother with expensive aquarium upkeep? Consider a subaquatic lair with a large window that reveals a shark feeding area.
3. Exposed Rock Face
Subterranean locations are popular for evil lairs in case of explosive fallout. Build your lair deep within the earth, hidden in a mountain pass or perhaps non proximity to an active volcano for some live magma action. Why cover up the exposed rock when it adds a natural, rugged edge to your layout? Adding natural stone provides both structure and balance.
4. Lit Torches and Candles
Flames are an important lighting source in every lair, and they subtly showcase your destructive power. Fire has long symbolized man’s greatest achievements, and open flames add a sense of uncertainty to your space.
5. A Large Swivel Chair
Being able to spin around to access various security screens, convert orders to henchmen, and confront heroes is paramount in an evil lair. Make sure that you invest in a comfortable swivel chair so that you can easily pivot from one task to the next. Spinning chairs come in any shape and style your dark heart desires, but always remember to test them out before you commit. After all, a chair’s lumbar support is just as important as its role in your dark bidding! For maximum evil, choose a large, majestic swivel chair with a “throne” vibe.
6. A Trap Door
Trap doors have accompanied villainous lairs for centuries and are trademarks of egress in your dungeon. The perfect trap door blends in with the rest of the room. A trap door should have multiple entrances and exits in case of an emergency. Keep your trap door hidden, and you’ll catch your nemeses in no time.
7. A Dungeon
Evil lairs often incorporate a perfect mix of modern and archaic features, but make your dungeon as old-fashioned as possible. Use harsh stone and wrought iron for the exterior, and make sure that the interior is cold, dark, and damp. For extra ambiance, make sure that it smells musty. Keep your dungeon away from all important sanctums of the lair, just in case.
8. Experiments
There is simply no excuse for an evildoer to not dabble in science or arcane experiments. Such discoveries push the boundaries of what humankind believes is possible. You can create biological mutants that lay suspended in goo, use advanced technology to build robots, or even create spells that can open portals to the arcane.
Experiments aren’t always easy, but finding a method to your madness makes you the ultimate supervillain.
With the perfect evil lair , the city — nay, the world — can be yours! Your lair is where the magic — and the devastation — happens, so put time and effort into the impression you want it to leave on the unfortunate souls who encounter it.
Featured Photo by Mikael Kristenson on Unsplash.
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