“I’m not kidding, when we return in a few months, I’ll be at a new job. Today is my last day”. I remember so many feelings rushing to my head when this statement left your mouth.
I was in absolute shock. “What? How? Why? And lastly…no!” This was the news I never knew how to prepare for. Sure, I knew it was coming at some point, but it wasn’t something that I was expecting to happen for at least another year or two. My work husband was leaving me, and there was nothing that I could do to change it.
After hearing the news (and trying to keep it together in front of you) – that came along with the hugging and promising to keep in touch – I went home and sobbed my eyes out. To be honest, I still can’t think about it for too long without crying.
I know this is what is best for you and what you need to succeed further on in life. But I can’t help but wonder “what about me? What am I supposed to do now?” You mean the absolute world to me, and for you to up and leave me like this hurts like a bitch. All I want to do is wake up from this nightmare.
We’ve been through so much together.
We’ve laughed, we’ve cried, we flirted, we’ve yelled and gotten mad at each other. But regardless of what happened during the day, we were always there for each other when we needed it the most. You’ve shown me that you’ve cared when other people in my life showed that they didn’t. You wiped the tears away, and have managed to make me smile on the hardest days of my life. There’s no way for me to thank you for that,
I seriously don’t know what I’d do without you now.
You came into my life at a time that I didn’t expect. I never thought we’d be nearly as close as we are, yet I’m here writing my feelings out to you in a goodbye letter. If I saw this when we first met, I definitely wouldn’t think it was about you.
I always thought we’d stick this place out together, for as long as we could. I never thought there would be a me without you at work. Now I have to figure out how to walk around the building without having you teasing me, or trying to distract me from my work. I have to act like nothing’s bothering me when I don’t see your goofy smile or hear your contagious laugh from a distance.And that kills me.
I think the reason why this stings so much is because I’m scared of what the future holds.
Sure, we have an amazing relationship, and I feel that our bond is irreplaceable. But what if we don’t keep in touch? What if things stop happening between us? I don’t want that to happen, but things are going to change and that breaks my heart to even think about.
This terrifies me, but I refuse to let things change drastically. I’m not letting you dissolve from my life. I can’t let that happen. Your presence in my life is too important to me, and I refuse to let anything happen to us and what we have.
You’re stuck with me, babe, and I’m not that sorry about it.
At least now, we can let those flirty moments happen a little more and see what happens when we do. Maybe this relationship needed to be taken outside the workplace…(you know I’ve had a crush on you since we met, right?)
Wherever life takes us, just know you’ll always have a special spot in my heart.
I’ll always look for you in the building, praying for the day you decide to stop for a visit. And you’ll always be the person I refer to as my work husband. No one is going to take that spot. (Let’s be real, no one in their right mind would put up with me the way you do… and vice versa.)
Ok, I think I’m done. Now go ahead, go on and change the world, and be the amazing person we all know you are. I’ll be here for you when you need me.
But…if you ever feel like coming back, don’t hesitate. I’ll hold the door open for you.
I love you, you idiot,
Xoxo,
Your Work Wife
Photo by Croissant on Unsplash
