As a woman, getting older is not exactly the most fun you will ever have. Unless you’re a modern maven who doesn’t mind having a mixed batch of grey hairs sprouting up in between your gorgeous dark brown locks, getting older kinda sucks.
Now, there is nothing at all wrong with aging gracefully – embrace your fine lines and grey hairs, laugh at the extra creases on your thighs and brush off the backache from sneezing. All the more power to you if you can look beyond those things and still be happy.
There is one vital area, however, that you should never overlook and that’s sex. Faking it was what your twenties were for. Your late forties should be more about empowerment and sexual freedom. Use these five tips below to improve your sex life if you aren’t happy with its current state:
1. Relax
Nothing ruins great sex faster than being anxious and on edge – unless it’s the edge of the bed! Learning to let go and give in to the pleasure can be difficult if you have spent the last twenty-odd years sucking in your tummy and preening to the hilt.
You can leave those misconceptions behind. Truly spectacularly great sex happens when it isn’t planned or scheduled, and you learn to just go with the flow. If that looks a little wobblier than before, so be it. Your body is a beautiful thing, and you should embrace it in all its glory.
2. Get Undressed
This one may sound like a no-brainer to younger women, but the older gals will know what it means. Something happens in the brains of some women as they age, where they no longer feel comfortable to bare all because “all” looks a little different from what it used to.
Be brave and take your kit off! If not now, then when, or ever? You have more than earned every cottage cheese patch or wrinkle – sex isn’t about the looks in your late forties; it is about the feeling.
3. Lubricate
The number one reason why older women fail to enjoy sex at a later age is that their bodies don’t work in quite the same way as they did in their twenties or thirties. A change in hormones as women get older can leave them drier than Arizona in the summer.
Don’t let that stop you from doing the sideways shuffle. Using a vaginal lubricant can make all the difference in the world. It can be the difference between your o-face and your urg-face.
4. Don’t Try Too Hard
One of the biggest contributors to boring or non-existent sex life in your late forties is because women’s insecurities propel them into thinking they need to somehow compensate for their muffin-top or extra skin.
That could not be furtherer from the truth – no woman in the history of sex has ever had to change how she wants to experience sex to please her partner. And yet, they all almost exclusively have done just that over the ages. It’s time to stop that and do what feels good for you, not just your partner.
5. Choose Comfortable Positions
Getting older means less tantric wheelbarrow monkey sex and a more delicate missionary style. For some, that is — if you’ve made it to your late forties and you can still do the crazy positions, then more power to you!If, like most women in this age group, bending over doesn’t come as easy as it used to — embrace the comfortable positions. That will give you far more time to enjoy the experience. We all know you deserve to!
Photo by Amina Filkins via Pexels
