Everyone assumes that you have your life together, and it’s not like you’ve given them any reason not to. All of your social media platforms scream carefree yet professional, nice but powerful, and a lot of other words that show a perfect balance in your life. They don’t see the mess your room is always in because you don’t have time to clean it or the dishes left in the sink that only gets done when company comes over.
You know how when something breaks and you use globs of super glue to put the pieces back but you can tell this is only a mediocre temporary fix? That’s what keeping yourself together too much looks like. I get it, you don’t want to cry about that thing going on in your own life, especially not to your friend who just vented to you about their own problems. But, if you’re not taking care of yourself, you can’t fully help take care of others.
You’re constantly told that you seem to have your life together, and people compliment you and question how you have remained so balanced. The thing is, more often than not, you feel as though you’re on a teeter-totter that you can’t get off of. If only people could see the reality of the chaos in your life because it’s really not all yoga mats and meditation.
There are a list of things you are doing because you have to.
You go to the gym because you would explode without this stress-relieving outlet. You are constantly at the library because it forces you to study, and you need those grades. You make healthy meals because that one week you didn’t, you felt so sluggish and unaccomplished you vowed never to feel that way again. You’re involved in school clubs and volunteer because grad schools want to see well-rounded students and don’t seem to care how many mental breakdowns you had along the way. You even work more than one job because you need to pay rent each month because tragically, you weren’t born famous.
Add up the hours the above tasks would take, and then add the time you spend in lectures and doing assignments, and you will see it surpasses the hours available in a week. It’s no wonder that you are drained. There isn’t even enough time to get those 8 hours of sleep you’re supposed to get.
You have gotten into a routine of saying you’re fine when asked how you are, and few notice that you are barely holding it together. Take time for yourself, because this is not something that will last forever. In the wise words of Selena Gomez, “if you are broken, you do not have to stay broken”. If you hold it together too much, and for too long, you will break, That part’s inevitable. Take a deep breath and scream or cry or do what you need to do to let out your feelings. Everyone breaks, and that is okay. You are not broken.
Featured image via Jason Yoder on Unsplash
